Saturday, November 7, 2009

Stand Up For Wrangler Butts

In my younger days I have spent many hours in country western bars. My father taught my sister, Caren, to dance. Caren is very competitive, so she has to be the best at everything this includes dancing. Well, to become the best one must practice, therefore I have spent a tremendous amount of time in country bars watching Caren dance.

If one went to a country western bar, one needed to be mindful of the "uniform":Men-tight Wrangler jeans, roper boots, shirts tucked in, belt buckle the size of a dinner plate. (The size of the buckle, the size of one's hand and so forth) Women-tight Rockies, ropers, shirts tucked in, belt buckle much smaller than men's belt buckles. If one chose not to wear the uniform, one was open to ridicule.

Because I am in a wheelchair, I am at a certain eye level that emphasizes my ability to view the Wrangler butt. I appreciate the Wrangler butt. A pair of tight Wranglers can even make a buttless man have a butt. Over the years, I became quite an aficionado of the "Wrangler butt".

It has been a long time since I have been to a country western bar. When I stopped driving I stopped going places. I stopped driving over twenty years ago which stopped my pleasurable journeys to The Land of the Wrangler Butts! I had to give up a lot of things when I stopped driving, but I think the loss of the observation cycle of the Wrangler butt was one of the top ten losses.

I was asked to go to a country western bar with some friends the other evening. I was looking forward to parking myself in my "regular" viewing spot; next to the dance floor where many a butt passes by throughout the evening. Much to my chagrin there were very few Wrangler butts! Oh, there were butts, but not Wrangler butts, and very few people were following the uniform code! Baggie jeans and flipflops?! Shorts! Untucked shirts and tennies?! Who let this happen and why?

Ladies, we must take a stand! There is nothing attractive about baggie jeans. The buttcrack and underwear view is very offensive. Ladies, stand up for your right to see a cute arse in a pair of tight jeans. Ladies, step outside and shout, "We're not gonna take it! We're not gonna take it! We're not gonna take it any more!" Okay sing it, if you want. Stand Up for Wrangler Butts!

Paco's Perspective

You have made me wear some really ridiculous stuff, but never a pair of tight Wrangler jeans. I could be jor leetle vaquero!


1 comment:

  1. Cathy, I love reading your blog. You should write a book. It will be as good as Erma Bombeck, and you will be rich and famous!!!

    ReplyDelete