WARNING-This communication may be offensive to some, many or all.-WARNING
While traveling the Interstate-10 in Phoenix I spied an electronic billboard. An ad for Abel's Funeral Services appeared and it was advertising a complete cremation for $586.25. So . . . .I was just thinking how much does a partial cremation cost and what part?
As I was sharing my thoughts with the "family" about the difference between a complete cremation and a partial cremation, I also explained my dilemma about my funeral plans. I want my "sistahs" to scatter my ashes, and I want an extremely long funeral procession. I want to mess up traffic. I want to mess up traffic so much that my number one rule for my funeral is: There Shall Be NO Carpooling! I concluded that when the casket is open only the top half is open. So . . . . I was just thinking I could kill two birds with one stone. ( I know this is a bad cliche for this blog, but I figured I have already offended so many readers what the . h . . .oops, there goes another one.)
Then Ben, Janet's son, suggested that since I am such a fan of The Wizard of Oz, maybe I should switch things up, if you know what I mean. I wonder if one has a choice with a partial cremation. I wouldn't have to worry about an outfit for the funeral. So . . . . I was just thinking, striped socks and sparkly red shoes.
I know that many readers think I am disgusting and morbid, but I tried to warn everyone. First, Abel's Funeral Service should not have advertised a complete cremation. Second, I am fifty-five and my parents were told that I wouldn't live past the age of sixteen, so . . . . . . it is time I start thinking.
I want to put the f-u-n into funeral, so . . . . I was just thinking!
Doesn't Dorothy have a little dog that she takes "home" with her?
What if I am not ready to go "home"?
So . . . . I was just thinking, Flip?
The Flip Side
So . . . . I was just thinking. . . . .
No I wasn't!